"Well-behaved women seldom make history."
- Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

Sunday, 31 May 2015

5 things you should never ask from your dancer

1. How much money you make?
I consider this question extremely rude from a customer. Specially when my money depends on how much he's willing to pay. My experience these guys just asking questions but don't want to spend much money in the club. And I never ask my customers how much money they have in their pocket!
Here in the blog I write about money and club system because I want to break the stereotype that we, dancers are super rich. Unfortunately it's not the case. But still the question is not polite at all.

2. Can we have sex in private?
NO. Even if it's possible in some club, don't make the wrong idea that you can have it in EVERY club, with EVERY dancer. If it's possible, wait until the dancer makes the move.. and you don't find yourself in an embarrassing situation, most importantly you won't piss of your dancer.

3. Is there camera in the private?
YES. The management wants to know what's going on there. Not only about sex but drugs or any crime. Or about dancers who make outside business or get cash from the customer when she's not allowed. Sometimes I can not take tips in private because it would lead me to further trouble with the club.
And sometimes for the dancer's safety. Can you imagine if the customer gets beating her up or being extremely aggressive with her? Or if something gets lost.. or stolen. Of course, they want to know about everything!

4. Do you want some beer?
Definitely not! I do drink champagne or coctails. Not because I'm a lady, but because I earn commission on it. Simple is that.

5. Can I have your number?
It depends. Some clubs allow it, some don't. It's not a lie if I tell you I can't because my boss watches us. But even if I can, I don't give my number to anyone. Only to those who became a regular customer or I spent a good time with. I don't want any disturbing messages or phone calls the middle of the night when I want to sleep! Way too many stalkers around..

+1. How do you find the work?
(This you can ask, but myself I'm bored to explain all the time..)
First thing to make it clear, yes, there are agencies for dancers to cooperate between the clubs and the girls. Usually clubs don't like girls working without an agency. And personally I prefer to work with agencies because if something happens they are there to help (like find a new place in short notice if necessary) and it's a safer way because they already know the club and its conditions. But I never need to be worried because I'm working as a self employed and I pay tax and insurance and I sign contracts with clubs all the time.

Thursday, 28 May 2015

Photoblog - inside the stripper's house

Many of you are wondering how and where we live. I hope this little photo selection  will satisfy your imagination. I'm a bit sad that I didn't take photos of the most extreme places, but that time I had no idea about this blog..

So here we are:

Sometimes I was accomodated in a hotel like this one. Perfect! We enjoyed the pool day and night!

In a few places the view from the room is breathtaking..

..sometimes not so.

Some club has the accomodation for the dancers in the middle of nowhere.

We feel lucky when there is a garden or at least a terrasse attached to the house..

..other places there is not even a proper window for the room.

It's a hard battle to deal with these stairs carrying 20+kg luggages with no help.

Some accomodations come with rules (and you can make fun of the boss's English)

And this is when there are no rules. But cockroaches and mice yes.

And now let's see where we actually live!

Not in luxury apartments but not on matrasses on the ground as some might think..

Monday, 25 May 2015

You CAN find a canary in this bird feeder

(Referring to those who think you can not.)

Someone told me that there is no possibility to find a canary in a bird feeder. I didn't know what he meant by that exactly and still don't know. Probably he was thinking that all strippers are the same and you can't find a nice, intelligent woman working in this industry. Maybe he just hasn't met one. Although some girls I worked with in this 8 years spent in Stripperland are very special persons. But to see this speciality, you have to dig a little bit deeper than the fancy costumes and perfume clouds around them. That's what I like about consumation. You have a good talk with the customer, not only jumping from table to table “Do you want a private dance? Do you want a private dance?” I'm not a canary, but not a parrot either to repeat myself hundred times a night saying the same things. With a bottle of champagne you build up a conversation with the client and you get to know lots of interesting things about each other.

But let's stuck to the title and allow me to be light hearted in this post. Nothing to take seriously or personal here. But this stripper bird feeder is more colourful and varied than you might think. Not only canaries and parrots come here to get some seeds. We also have some sparrow: she's the beginner and she has very little idea about the work. She's shy and usually not flashy with clothes and make up. Sometimes she looks like a female customer in the club. Average and ordinary. And just like the sparrow, she feels better and safer in other's company. BUT sometimes these girl has bigger success with customers than the one who work in clubs for years! Because she is fresh, innocent and naive.

We also have peacocks. Just like the male peacock, she has a colourful shiny or neon colour costume that you can spot from any corner of the room. Huge hair extension and extra long eyelashes. But in the morning in the changing room when she takes off all the artificial accessories, she looks like nothing but a huge chicken. Just like the male peacock when he's losing his tailfeathers. Seriously, I met girls that I didn't recognise after work without all her trimming!

What else we have.. we have skylark. She has sweet voice and she can chirping to your ears until you pay her a private dance. I've already mentioned the parrot. She's the cool and funny one, even can make some tricks. You can teach her words, she will repeat what you said to her. But be careful, just like a parrot, often to others.. And the we often have crow sitting in black dress at the bar. She is usually older dancer who's not happy with her job (nor with herself). When I'm new in the club, she is the first flying to me and telling how s*** is this club and I won't make money there because of that and that reasons because she had that and that problems with this club and her list is endless. She really enjoys croaking bad omens. I don't like this type of girls. Just because she is not happy in the current club, she tries to make me unhappy too and telling me how I can't make money there when I haven't work there only a few hours. Let me see it myself!

I often meet magpie in clubs. About them, I have lots of stories! When something disappear from the apartment or the changing room and nobody has seen anything. In one club a girl took all the other dancer's money from the apartment and she flew away next morning. And just like the magpie, they prefer shiny things: jewelleries, money, or your favourite costume. They can make the work very unpleasure, it doesn't matter how careful you are, it's always a risk that there is one amongst us.

My favourites are the lovebirds. They fall in love with a customer and stay in one place or settle down. I've seen example of that too. Some quitted dancing and have family by now. And I'm happy if they found their happiness.

And if you ask what type of bird could I be in this bird feeder, I would say I'm a crane. I'm just sitting at the bar and keep my eyes on the water. If I have an eye contact or a smile with a customer, that's a deadly catch. With this strategy I do mistakes rarely. But the management don't understand and they want to kick my ass all the time because I don't work. I do, but in a less visible way. In this way I don't waste my time and I get less rejection. But they prefer the parrot girls who flies to every customer's shoulder “Do you want a dance?”

So you can see how varied this bird feeder is. Not to mention the fact that some birds are just guests in it as they are fly away to other destinations when the winter (or summer) comes. We don't stay long in one place, if the food is gone, we just spread our wings and you might never see us again. So when you spot a special specie in your nearest bird feeder, take a chance to talk to her!

Saturday, 16 May 2015

The Antwerp Boot Camp

I couldn't say a better description of the clubs here. It's like a hard physical and mental military training where they push you beyond your own limits. I've worked here in a different club maybe 5 years ago, I knew what to expect, but things in time didn't get any better. I remember 5 years ago when they offered an extra day off because they had enough girls, me and my friend stood up first. Those were very well appreciated and well spent days off with sleeping and resting after the exhausted work!
That's my 2nd week working here and I feel I have no more power. Either physically and mentally. I should be a social butterfly with a huge smile on my face but some clubs just know how to kill it. All night long they leave the aircon on, it doesn't matter if there are customers or not. Sometimes you feel you're sitting in the fridge for hours – wearing nothing else but lingerie. And they don't care much if the girls are cold or getting sick. We are sitting in a bar chair all night with straight back (just like in school) and we have to dance minimum 7-8 times a night on stage, again if there are customers or not. I'm really crying back those times and clubs where nobody came in and we were sleeping or reading books on comfy sofas. Here we can't even sit in the VIP area when no customers. Until 7am. We can't leave even 10 minutes earlier. Then we sign the papers etc., often it's 8.30-9am when I go to bed. All for €35 fix salary per day (I make most of my money from tips, but this is not the kind of money you can rely on.) And if I fancy a drink from the bar (anything except water, even juice), I have to pay for it myself.

But what is really disturbing me that's the music. 8 hours house music, no variety. And it's way too loud. If I don't be deaf by end of the contract here, that's a miracle. No chance to talk to someone without screaming, sometimes I don't hear my own voice. This music is perfect when you're on drugs but if not? I don't take any.. (but here I'm seriously thinking about it just to survive!) Ah, and drugs: it's a Canaan for those who take drugs because you can get ANYTHING from customers for free! But if you don't, it sucks. And sometimes the other boss (I didn't know he's also a boss, I thought he's just a drunk, drugged attention-seeking customer because he don't behave like a boss) comes in and makes noise hitting a metal tray on the bar. It's a proper mental terror! (and God knows how much I'd like to hit his head with that tray at 6.30am!)

In the apartment the kitchen is empty, we didn't have even a kettle. I voluntarily bought one because I didn't want to go outside to Starbucks every time I fancy a coffee. (I drink a lot!) In the other apartment the girls put some money together to buy a micro so at least they can heat up their food. We don't even have a fridge! And when you work in places like this, you need to eat properly and healthy as food is a source of energy. I'm eating fast food since I'm here, no wonder I have not too much of energy these days. Not even for posting here.

So yes, this club really pushing my limits, both mental and physical. But as they say if it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger. I hope it's true..

(In the last few post it sounds I complained a lot about the clubs I worked at. It's kind of true because lately I didn't work in a club where I felt good and appreciated. And these are the pure facts about the stripping industry, no make up. If you think it's a sugary, sweet world where everybody is happy and makes amazingly good money, then this blog is for you to read.)

Tuesday, 5 May 2015

Photoblog - House of Fetish

Just a little proof that I'm doing fetish modeling sometimes.. :) I hope you like it!

Photo by Eddie Ataman

With love,


Saturday, 2 May 2015

Why I prefer to work with men

I definitely prefer a male manager or boss over a woman. I work with other girls and indeed we are not always nice to each other, a woman who has power over the dancers can be more harmful than our nastiest colleague. Specially the ones who were dancers themselves before and now they feel superior because now they work behind the bar.. Hallelujah! Such a big step on a career ladder! I had a quite bad experience in Oslo with the girl who works at the bar. I'm really not an ass-kissing person and she has had her favourite girls already, so I didn't even try to be nicer to her than it's required for a harmonious work relationship. But once we went down to the VIP area with my customer, and he took off his jacket and looked around if there is any hanger or something for the coat. I dared to ask the girl if we have any.
“No, but we have enough coach where he can put it.. as you can see.” with an absolute hater in her voice just because I had this innocent question. How nice!
“I wouldn't ask if he wasn't looking for one...”
Needless to say, that put a stamp on our further collaboration. I got drunk later that night and I absolutely can not be controlled under the influence of alcohol, so she sent me back to the changing room when I just wanted to say goodbye to the guy. (He stayed 10 more days in Oslo and I wanted to make sure he would come back as it's my money end of the day) But she didn't let me to do for whatever reason. I went furious, words after words I was screaming at her. She told me she won't help me in the future any more and I remember yelling at her: “I don't need your help! I just need you to be correct with me as you are with the others!” And I really meant it, drunk or not. I don't need any special treatment but it pulls the trigger when somebody is not correct or rude when I didn't give a reason. I'm working with alcohol and it can't be possibly to get rid of the full bottles and if I'm drunk I'm more emotional, but a manager has to be cold-headed and tolerate it more not to respond to it in a bitchy way.
Even worst when the manager is a woman and she's drunk.. or at least doesn't have a clear mind. Once I had an argument with my manager in one club in London, and she went on fire! I wanted to quit from the argument but she followed me where ever I went screaming behind my back. “You think everyone is the boss's slut here?!” I tried to ignore her as this is the best way you can do but she got more and more furious. Things came to her mind – and on her tongue – that don't make sense. She twisted everything I've ever told her and used it against me. Things like I think the other manager is a lesbian and I was in love with one of the guy from the club and so on. She went back behind the bar and continued screaming at me – at that point I was just laughing at her inside – trying to humiliate me but it was a backfire. All the girls and customers looked at her like an evil witch who lost the control over herself. The situation got really nasty and I had to call the male manager who worked in another club to stop her. I tried to be calm as much as I could, but enough is enough!
Or the worst ever when the boss's girlfriend works behind the bar.. God save our souls! It happened in Brussels. Literally that woman threw the cigarette towards me when I stood close to her. And in the beginning I thought she's nice.. OK, every time the girls asked for a drink from the bar, she gave us only half glass while her male colleague gave us a normal adult size of drink. She even saved the water, never filled up the glass properly. But that's OK. You don't take it as offensive. But that woman literally hated the girls. We could feel it. Well, if someone is not trying to climb on her boyfriend's back, maybe she would have more confidence and bigger self-esteem, and she could be happier with her life. (Just a thought.) But she's trying to hold her position too tight (both in the club and in her boyfriend's bed). Not unusual from a woman. But if the boss can't control her lover/girlfriend working behind the bar, give her a scold's bridle not to ruin the atmosphere!
Although I worked with men that have very hectic and unbalance emotional statement, usually men are more direct and better problem solvers. And in this business trouble can happen any night. I remember when I got fired from a club in Switzerland. The woman there was also not too nice, but I've heard stories about the owner that how rude he can be the girls. There, I really didn't work well so he called me in his office and gave me 1 more week notice before he wanted fire me. And I told him “I don't need that 1 week, I can tell you right now that I'm not happy in your club and I won't make better business to you in that week, so better not to waste our time.” I was correct and honest and guess what? He let me stay in the club's apartment free of charge (because I didn't make money) until I find something else. Such a big difference of dealing with problems, isn't it?