We, dancers, are naked therapist

Stripping is an expensive job emotionally, people with tempers find me often. Not only customers, but girls also if there is something bothers them. Sometimes I feel I'm doing a therapy session at work.

“Because you are pure and such a good person, thank you for listening to me.” I hear often.

If you'd like to read more, go to my website.

My Top 20 chart

Sometimes I work in clubs where is a DJ, so I don't need to select my own music to dance to. But then I have to dance on any songs he plays without any requests. In other clubs there is a DJ and I can give him my music or even he asks me to choose my own songs. Often I'm not bothered, I just tell him to play any.. as one my manager used to say "you're a dancer, you must to know how to move on any kind of songs." Nothing more disappointing then seeing and amazing pole dance show when the dancer can't follow the rhythm of her music. I've seen enough examples of that.. If I have to choose, I always pick those that suitable to my move.

Still, I have my favourites. And just like in anything, I like to be unique in choosing the right songs as well. I never choose the songs that you can hear on the radio every day, or the classic striptease music like the You Can Leave Your Hat On. I have music from all over the world. That's why happened that in the Caribbean I danced on German songs, in Germany I dance on French songs.

Here is the list:

20. Baby Bash ft. Akon - I'll be your lover

19. Sido - Strip fur mich

18. Macka Diamond - Dye dye

17. Ivan Dorn vs. Klaas - The Lova

16. Maitre Gims - J'me tire

15. Tiziano Ferro - Senza scappare mai piu

14. Gyptian - Hold you

13. Massari - Real love

12. Blero - Sexy moves

11. Clara Morgane - Strip tease

10. Lil Kim - Kitty box

9. One Republic - Secrets

8. Gasparoff - Knights of Citeriya

7. Ofra Haza - Show me

6. Andreea D - Paradise

5. D'Banj - Oliver Twist

4. Isthar - Last kiss

3. Massari - Inta hayati

2. Xavier Naidoo - 20.000 Meilen
1. Kymani Marley - Royal vibes

Here is also a playlist: 
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL-9O4rU_GHeKBOyjkAq_W1WxnXSrsqXcH
There is no special order between the songs, I equally like them. It depends on my mood which one I prefer to dance to. But the No.1. is on the first place, because whenever I danced on this song, girls couldn't wait for me leaving the club and they could use it for their own performance. So it's not just my No.1.!

And then when I have to make a special show, I like to do a little belly dance. These are the songs for my fantasy shows:

Sarah Brightman - Harem
Alanis Morisette - I remain
Amr Diab - Tamally Maak

So that is the list of my favourite songs. I hope you enjoy them as much as I enjoy dancing on them. :)

How men approach a stripper

My job is to approach clients, I keep it in mind. But different men, different rules. Some don't even bother to be nice, when he sees I'm going to his table, just lifts up his hand in the air showing I'm not welcome there. Others are talking to me for long minutes without buying me a drink and then they are surprised why I stop answering them or apologise that I must go to work. 

So let's see here what are the most behaviour of men in approaching a dancer.

If you'd like to read more, go to my website.

What do you do in private?

“It's called private dance. So guess what? I'm dancing!”

“Ahh! Only dancing?”

I hate this question so much! My job is selling an erotic fantasy, nothing more, nothing less. So here it is what I'm doing in private (dedicated to the one who wished to read more fantasies on my blog):

You pay for the dance at the bar. When the payment is gone through I hold your hand and take you to the VIP area. I smile because I'm happy to tease such a handsome man! I open the curtains and there are a cosy leather sofa, some candles and soft music playing in the background. Everything is set up for a seductive mood.

If you'd like to read more, please visit my website.

Just some thoughts..

I'm really on a deep level of understanding myself more and I made some amazing discovery. I realised what is my true problem in this industry. I'm way TOO FEMININE for this work! You think it's great, a stripper must be feminine. A feminine woman is more pleasure for the eyes. But it's not exactly the truth.

The woman seduces. But this work is not about seduction any more. It's manipulation. How can we get more money out of the guy, how can we keep him all night in the club to spend more, how can we get some cash from him. Seduction? Ehh.. pure manipulation. Now you think there is not a big difference between the two. Indeed it's huge! When a woman seduces, she places the man in the centre of her attention. When she manipulates him, the focus on the thing what she can get from him. In our case, that's his wallet. The man who belongs to this wallet?? Kidding, right?

To read more, go to my website.

5 things you should never ask from your dancer

1. How much money you make?

I consider this question extremely rude from a customer. Especially when my money depends on how much he's willing to pay. My experience these guys just asking questions but don't want to spend much money in the club. And I never ask my customers how much money they have in their pocket!

Here in the blog, I write about money and club system because I want to break the stereotype that we, dancers are super-rich. Unfortunately, it's not the case. But still, the question is not polite at all.

To read more, visit my website.

The Antwerp Boot Camp

I couldn't say a better description of the clubs here. It's like a hard physical and mental military training where they push you beyond your own limits. I've worked here in a different club maybe 5 years ago, I knew what to expect, but things in time didn't get any better. I remember 5 years ago when they offered an extra day off because they had enough girls, my friend and I stood up first. Those were very well appreciated and well spent days off with sleeping and resting after the exhausting work!

To read more, visit my website.

Why I prefer to work with men

I definitely prefer a male manager or boss over a woman. I work with other girls and indeed we are not always nice to each other, a woman who has power over the dancers can be more harmful than our nastiest colleague. Especially the ones who were dancers themselves before and now they feel superior because now they work behind the bar... Hallelujah! Such a big step on a career ladder! I had a quite bad experience in Oslo with the girl who works at the bar. I'm really not an ass-kissing person and she has had her favourite girls already, so I didn't even try to be nicer to her than it's required for a harmonious work relationship. But once we went down to the VIP area with my customer, and he took off his jacket and looked around if there is any hanger or something for the coat. I dared to ask the girl if we have any.

To find out more, visit my website.

Working on Special Events

There are some social events out there that bring more strippers in the town. Like the golf season in Portugal or the Sailing Week in Sylt, Germany. As a dancer you have to apply to book your place otherwise it will be too late. Like me now, in early March I applied to Monaco for the Grand Prix and it was already no free space. They said if someone makes cancellation, I can go but who would cancel such a moneymaker event? Never mind, I've worked already in Nice during the Monaco Grand Prix and during the Macau Grand Prix. They were a few good days moneywise. In Macau we had to wear a racer girl costume, it was quite funny. Previous year girls even made a promotion on the racing fields. Yeah, when I write or say I do promotion for clubs (when I don't want to give out details about my job) actually it's not a lie as I often do that, it's kind of part of my job.

To read more, please visit my website.

Workplace hazards in the stripping industry

I don't want to mention again the alcohol-human stupidity combination here, I wrote enough about this one. But there are other hazards there, Some you might not think about that can cause an issue. For example the ability of smoking inside the club. Yes, there are clubs in Europe where people can smoke. Smoker dancers are very happy about it. But what about the non-smokers? It happened not only once when the club was busy and the stage is higher than the tables, but I was also in tears during my performance because of the too much smoke inside. I mean the smoke of the cigarette, not complaining about the smoke machine! I remember after the Dorsia in Antwerp I got home, opened my suitcase and it smelled like an ashtray! All my clothes took the smell of cigarettes. There the Fridays-Saturdays were killer. The club worked with a full house on the weekends, once I even lost my voice because of the smoke. Too loud music also has good benefits for health.

To read more, check out my website.

Greetings from Belgium!

Although the whole trip didn't start in a smooth way (just as none of them lately) now I find everything fine here. I've worked in Belgium before, both Antwerp and Brussels so I'm a bit familiar with the country, I don't feel a total stranger here.

Why I said it was not a smooth start then? I work the first time with this agency. He's Hungarian. I don't like to work with Hungarians as they seem to overcomplicate everything. This one drove me crazy asking my Hungarian tax number and he just stuck to his point, he didn't want to understand I have no longer tax number or official address in Hungary. But finally, after a short battle, he accepted my English tax number pff...! But it was not all. 

If you'd like to read more, check out my website.

No way, Norway!

As it always happens to me, if I'm desperate to go to a place, it turns out something unpleasant. Same happened here. I was keen on coming here but now I can't wait for my contract to finish. I heard lots of good things about working in Norway, especially about the clubs in Bergen and Trontheim. But when I sent my application there, the manager replied that he's very selective with girls and that the moment he wanted younger and very acrobatic pole dancers because he had enough “older and talker” (actually I like the idea because he makes sure each customer can find the type of girl he likes) But after I found agencies working with clubs in Oslo, and I applied even I heard some bad stories about it. But if you never try, you never know...

To read more, check out my website.

Laura's research into lapdance experienses 3.

“Do you see your work as a type of acting? (like an actress going onto a stage and performing a certain identity, pretending to be a different person)”

“Why do you choose to use a different name to your actual name? Is your stage name may be part of a different part of your identity that you act?”

Find my answer here.

Andiamo, prego, tutti frutti, macaroni

After 1 week of working in Pescara, I still haven't decided if I like it here or not. I'm wondering how other clubs work in Italy because this one has a strange system for me. When I think I've seen every type of clubs I always must realise I haven't and some place still can hold some surprise. 

Why Pescara? Simply because one of my agency has contact with the club here and they offered a higher salary if I start between Christmas and New Year's Eve. That's why. Some men suggested me to work in Milan as it is a wealthy city, but I don't know any clubs there or even an agency that works with any clubs there.

To find out more, visit my website.

Laura's research into lapdance experienses 1.

I met a girl in Paris who told me she's studying on university and how she entered the whole glittery pinky stripper world was that she went interviewing a few dancers in a local club to write an essay and she started to like the atmosphere and decided to work in clubs afterwards. See, not every girl's doing it for money or because they have been forced to do so, but some also realise it's such a good job to learn about our own sexuality and express ourselves. So after talking to her, I got an email from a lovely girl – let's call her Laura - who asked my help to write her dissertation. “I am doing research for my dissertation, which is looking into the ways in which lap-dancing is empowering for women, but I also want to learn about the difficult parts of the industry! Basically, I just want to give an honest story. I have never done lap-dancing before so I cannot write from my own experiences, and I came across your blog and it is so interesting! You seem very honest about your work and you seem to have travelled and worked in many countries.” I thought such a brave girl to write about this subject and I'm happy to help if it doesn't cost money so I said yes to her. And some of her questions are so intelligent and worth to write a whole post as an answer.

“How did you feel when a customer breaks the rules and touches your intimate area when giving them a naked lap dance? “

You can read my answer here.

Club overview - Remich, Luxembourg

I must say that was my shortest contract with a club ever. I booked my place through an agency and the conditions sounded good. They offered 70€ fix salary per day plus 20% drink commission plus the dances and free accommodation. Not bad at all. I arrived form France on the train quite late at night. A guy was waiting for me outside the train station. He looked OK for first sight (if I smell danger, I just don't sit in his car), he told me the club is outside Luxembourg city so we need to take a short drive. It was nothing unusual or made me suspicious. 

To find out more, go to my website.

Happy Halloween! Boo hoo!

Hm, I think this year I will skip all these Halloween madness as I go back from Paris to London earlier as I planned. Just in case I brought my sexy nurse costume with me to dress up but I don't feel the need for a crazy Halloween party. I have had it enough. When I was working in London it was always a big deal, we were talking about costumes and make-ups and decoration even a month before. I'm sure for clubs it's a very good business every year because everyone likes to dress up and being abnormal for a night.

To find out more, visit my website.

Bon jour, Geneve!

Here's I am again. I must say during a year period I was working another place, here nothing changed. Every night the same faces. Some I truly missed. Good to see these people again and carry on the same conversion that we had a year ago. Like I had a young customer that we talked a lot about the Caribbean and Japan because he visited those places several times. And since we haven't met I got to both places and now have lots of stories to share with him. That's a shame I didn't have his contact to send him a message that "Greetings from Japan!" But now I'm so happy to see and talk to him again.

To read more, visit my website.

Good bye Skegness!

Last week was raining. I thought this week won't be different. But I'm happy for these days in this small room alone (in the one with the window!) because I can focus on more writing and I had time for some "emotional housecleaning". This year I wanted to go to the pilgrim's road to Santiago de Compostella but it requires some financial background what I don't have this very right moment. Hopefully, my bank account balance will be more stable on the spring and I can rethink it. I have this feeling that I want to be a little isolated from people. I think it's normal if you constantly work with people (drunk, stupid,  arrogant and loud people..) to be alone in your own world to recharge your batteries. Skegness is the best from that point. 

To read more, please visit my website.

The list of the clubs I worked

Another day I was thinking about the number of clubs I've worked. Here is the whole list:

Blue Angel, London, UK
Director's Lodge, London, UK
Sexyland (Babel), Loutraki, Greece
Dorsia, Antwerp, Belgium
Charlie's, London, UK
Churchills, London, UK
Goddess, Nice, France
St. Louise, Brussels, Belgium
Empire, Brussels, Belgium
Paradise, Remich, Luxembourg
Fairbanks, Toronto, Canada
Maveriks, Cape Town, South Africa
Z1, Sylt, Germany
Beverly, Vienna, Austria
Gaslight, London, UK
Valentino, Koblach, Austria
Evita, Wil, Switzerland
Six Days, St. Gallen, Switzerland,
Sensi, Geneva, Switzerland
Messalina, Stuttgart, Germany
Divino, Macau, China
Saumur Crystal Club, Luxembourg
L'extase, Guadeloupe, French Caribbean
Paradise, Yokohama, Japan
La Cave Bastiaise, Corse, France
VIP, Reykjavik, Iceland
Flirtz, Skegness, UK
Pink Paradise, Paris, France
Le Chat Noir, Pescara, Italy
Atlantic, Osnabruck, Germany
Lotus Showbar, Oslo, Norway
City Club, Brussels, Belgium
Abilux, Antwerp, Belgium
Crystal, Aarhus, Denmark
Club Glamour, Lloret de Mar, Costa Brava, Spain
Crystal club (Stage 2000) Nuremberg, Germany
Conchili, Ludwigsburg, Germany
Teatro, Wetzikon, Switzerland
Red lips, Zurich, Switzerland
Cleopatra, Stuttgart, Germany
Stripclub Dolls, Zaventem, Belgium

If you have ever been in any of them, I would be happy to hear your stories!