"Well-behaved women seldom make history."
- Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

Sunday, 31 August 2014

Why are men so coward these days?

(Some big Egos for sure would love to burn me at the stake after reading this article!)

Yesterday night I had an interesting conversation with one of my customers. We started to talk about relationships generally and he said his opinion is that we live in a women's world. The guy is a master in 3 different kind of martial arts, not the stereotype of a mommy's boy, so I was surprised when I heard that from a strong alfa-male type of guy. Such a convenience, earlier I was reading an article about that, when the writer – a man – had the same opinion.
And dear Gentlemen, I share the same thoughts. The women are braver and more open these days and more capable to take the consequences for their own acts, for their own feelings. The men look strong and brave, but if you scratch their big Egos, you realise under the surface how emotionally instable they are. Immature. Full of doubts and despairs. (Come on, you can throw those stones, but sorry if the shoe fits...) I give you examples. My ex after 2 years relationship just disappeared. Not giving any explanation, not answering my emails, my questions, just totally cut me off. I still don't know exactly why. Or the guy I was seeing lately after we had an argument, just deleted me from Facebook instead of finding solution for the problem. That was his problem solving method. (Of course, later he sent me a friend request again, but I don't play this game. Once you deleted me, it's going to stay like that. Friend and unfriend me and friend request again.. so childish! Oh, and he is in his fourties!) And I can bring you tonnes of example from my life. Even a customer. “I will have a dance with you later. I just need to go to the toilet first.” He never came back. And the list is endless.. The other girl who sat at the table was nodding her head and also brought up some examples from her life.
The question is there dear Gents: why are you not able to tell us the truth? Why is it easier to sneak out than face the problems? You have a straight opinion but you are afraid to say.. One guy told me when he and his partner are having an argument, it's always good to wait until the storm is gone. But when is no storm? When the situation is simple and not emotions are involved? Why are you not able to say out loud in a strip club that “Sorry, you're pretty but I prefer tall (short, blonde, brunette girls with big boobies, etc. etc.)” or “I want to take your friend for a dance. Is that OK?” Of course, it's OK! I would even say thank you being honest and not wasting my time. (Forget about those girls who get sore and call you an idiot because they are also immature.)
And there is one thing you definitely have to think about: how you want me to respect you after I figured out you're a coward? You're afraid of making decisions in your private life or not able to take the consequences for you actions? You're always pointing the other but never say “Sorry, I made a mistake?” You can not face the problems and you can't act like a grown up man? When you're just being cold and keep distance instead of saying “Honey, it ain't gonna work for us.”? Lots of guys can not be upfront.
I'm not perfect either. I have my own mistakes (a full list of them!) But I never put my head into the sand when it comes to difficulties and I always keep my promises. And I want the same in return. Someone told me I'm a man-hater. No, I'm not. I make money out of them, how can I hate them? :) End of the day they pay my rent, my bills, my travels. I don't hate them. I just don't always understand them. I'm also aware of that there are guys who don't fall into this category. Luckily. But I meet them rarely. And don't tell me those guys just want to be polite! You still can reject someone on a polite way.. and you gain some respect in return. That point we also agreed with my customer but he couln't give me answers. I took him for a dance instead..

Dear Gentlemen, the question is there. If you feel offended or you can answer my question, please don't hesitate to comment!
I would be happy to hear different opinion.


  1. hmmm - good question.
    i think that truth hurts - so lying is an alternative people can live with it.

    1. It's not an excuse. Lies can hurt too.... :/

      I don't blame them. I just try to understand this habit.

  2. it is a common habit - when seeing a problem the best alternative is either to hide or to run away ...
    who wants to stay and fight? this costs ressources ...

    1. Yes but if as a woman I can stay and fight until they hide and run away, how they want me to respect them?